Thanksgiving is nearly upon us. A time for being thankful, eating turkey or tofurkey, cranberry sauce, yams, and pumpkin pie.
In Minnesota, the Land of 10,000 Laws, this is a time when Minnesotans had better be on their best behavior when it comes to how their treatment of livestock.
You see, under Minnesota state law, turkey and chicken scrambles are patently illegal. We’re not talking about scrambled eggs here. Section 343.36 of the Minnesota Code outlaws ‘turkey scrambles,’ defined as when a “turkey is released or thrown into the air and wherein the object is the capture of the chicken or turkey.”
What exactly gets scrambled when turkeys and chickens are released in the air? Do they get indigestion? Do they get dizzy like kids who spin themselves and their friends silly on playground merry-go-rounds (a perfectly legal activity in Minnesota)? Does the their ability to think straight get a little too gobblery, what with all the brief, momentary period of flying to and fro?